Why I don’t consider myself a Brahmin ?
Not recently, but at different points of time, this question has been raised to me directly or indirectly which I think I should clarify in detail. People tend to suggest me what I should do and what I should not, and criticize me for things I do as they believe shouldn’t be done by a so called Brahmins.
Starting with who do we call Brahmin in Hindu religion, I think anyone can refer to the pretty well explained wikipedia article. But to summarize in a sentence, I can say that those who bear the ‘Brahmagyaan’ or ‘the knowledge of the Universe’ are considered as Brahmins. Now, what does ‘knowledge of Universe’ means ? At the time when Hindu religion was shaping up, it is ridiculous to assume that man had the knowledge of the entire Universe. In fact, it was the contents of the Vedas and Upanishads that were considered to be the knowledge centers. So in short, Brahmins were those fellows, who were highly literate at those times, and knew pretty well of the Vedas and Upanishads.
Do I have the knowledge of Vedas and Upanishads ? I don’t have the faintest idea of these. So I am not a Brahmin by definition.
Now that was how the Brahmins originated. Literate learned persons in the society. And in those days, most of the people used to be very religious. Of course we have religious people now also, but the ratio is substantially low. They used to worship their Gods. And they needed someone to do it for them. Now obviously it was the Brahmin people who did this job as they were learned enough and could recite sanskrit shlokas. And with time, they got this specific identity as Pundits and Temple Priests. And when social structure was divided into castes based on their job profile, Brahmins were known to be the people doing all sorts of religious rituals.
Do I do rituals etc. or the job of a priest ? No! So I am not a Brahmin by profession.
The next thing that comes into question is heredity. I am born in a family that has a Brahmin surname. But does it make sense to call someone a Brahmin, just because he is born with such a surname? What difference does a surname make ? We should better stick to the original definition of a Brahmin which makes better logic, than to claim that caste is hereditary.
I have been criticized for eating non-vegetarian food being a so called Brahmin. What does my taste buds have to do with my surname ? Should I stop eating what I like to eat, just because my surname matches with the category of people who used to be vegetarians in some ancient time ? And in today’s world, I have seen many people who claim themselves as Brahmin and still eat non veg food. At least I am not being hypocritical.
I have been criticized for not knowing how to worship. Not holding fasts. Not going to the temple and not knowing the Hanuman Chalisa or other shlokas. Do you expect me to do all those things that a Brahmin used to do in 19th century probably ? In that case, I shouldn’t have done Engineering as Brahmins are not supposed to do this job! In fact, almost all of us, shouldn’t be doing what we are doing, by the Hindu religion’s definition of castes. Should we all move back by 100 years ? Ridiculous!
I am not saying that knowing the shlokas or Hanuman Chalisa drags you back into the historical period. But then, knowing it is also not a compulsory thing. If you are interested, go ahead and learn. If you are not, chill! It has got nothing to do with my surname whatsoever. And knowing these things doesn’t make one a better person than the other guy who doesn’t know it. I am an Engineer by profession. And I am better than many! I am not a priest by any standards, so do not search for the skills of a priest in me.
And if I would start everything doing like a so called Brahmin should do, you’ll again start pointing fingers at me for I wouldn’t touch you, I would treat you as lower untouchable castes, I wouldn’t join you for dinner and I wouldn’t allow you to enter my house! Will you be happy if everyone in the society behaves in this way ? At one side, you complaint about the caste-ism and at the same time you want me to behave as a Brahmin ? Who is being hypocritical now ?
I will not talk about fasts, worshiping, temple going etc. They belong to a different league of matters and I would write another piece of junk sometime on those things. But to summarize, Brahmanism is not hereditary, it is something which is earned. We can’t move forward if we stick to old customs which probably were good at old times but do not fit now. Eating non veg on a Thursday or Tuesday is as heinous (if you think it heinous) as eating it on a Sunday. And going to the temple every Monday wouldn’t make oneself more human. Some people go for jogging every morning, some go to temples to satisfy their inner mind. Its just a matter of choice. It doesnt make one superior or inferior to others.
Finally, it is ridiculous to say that I should do something because my surname says so!
Venezia!
Returned from a day’s trip to Venice.
A nice place indeed and worth a visit. Of course, it’s not possible to cover all the places in 1 day. But, that was all I could afford.
The city is incredible! Its’ flooded. And I wonder how the the people survive in day to day affairs. Not a single vehicle to be seen, as there isn’t any road at the first place! All you can see is Big Canals, medium sized canals and small narrow canals, and accordingly big boats and smaller boats. Every house/hotel/office (or any place for that matter) opens directly to one or the other canal. They have thick wood logs planted everywhere to park their boats. The only mean of transport is of course by boats. I am really surprised how they deal with basic necessities such as telephone, internet service, drinking water supply, electricity and postal service etc. Its really freaky!
The city was crowded heavily. Mostly with tourists for obvious reasons. We started with the pretty well known place called San Marco. This is the place which shows up in the first scenes of the movie ‘The Italian Job‘. Roamed around here and there. Saw some Churches, old buildings, Opera Theaters and local markets. Tried authentic Italian Pizza, which was good! Took a boat to the adjoining islands Murano and the Lido. Murano has got a number of glass factories and stores selling colorful glass artifacts. And Lido has got a beach, and moreover it has roads! There are plenty of Ice Cream shops in Venice selling ‘homemade’ (which they claim) ice creams. We tried a few flavors too.
Love birds romancing is not a rare site. Mostly they take the Gondolas and float along some of the narrow channels in the city and enjoy the peaceful surroundings there away from the crowd. I guess murdering or committing suicide wont be much difficult there. Just tie one up and throw him into tha canal and work is done. And canals are everywhere! After all, all you have there is water!
Good old days
I am not a regular TV viewer except for news and occasional cricket. In fact, I don’t find anything else interesting or useful to watch. May be the society gradually moved forward from plain and simple Doordarshan programs to new-age sensational and vulgar reality shows and I was left behind! Or probably I have just grown old to enjoy these sorts of shows.
But I used to be a regular viewer (when I was a kid!). And now, when I occasionally stumble across those programs of DD National on web, it makes me feel nostalgic, and crave for those good old days. How wonderful those shows used to be! Plain, simple yet elegant. They used to touch the life of a common man. And the most beautiful thing about them was you could watch them along with your family without getting embarrassed due to some ‘scenes’.
My general knowledge on today’s TV programs is not very updated. It has been more than a year since I saw something on TV. And the schedule used to be filled with different sorts of soap operas and reality shows, unrealistic, meaningless and vulgar. People still like them. That’s crazy! Particularly those reality shows like Emotional Atyachaar, Splitsvilla, Roadies, Big Boss, Date Trap etc. where the contestants abuse each other, mingle in explicit acts on camera, fight with others voraciously, seduce other contestants and so on. I don’t understand whats there to enjoy in it? You like to hear some abuses? As if you haven’t heard any abuse in life. Go to any place in Delhi/Punjab and your hunger for all sorts of abuse will be satisfied!
Anyways, thanks to YouTube and the Web in general, that some of those programs from good old Doordarshan days are still available to me 
(e.g. Byomkesh Bakshi, Tehkikat, Mahabharat, Chanakya, Tenali Rama etc. ). Wish I could get more of those!
1 year in Germany
And thus I completed 1 year of stay in Germany. It has been a year of mixed feelings and experiences, both good and bad. And this is a brief account of my experiences in last 1 year.
1. Met people (lots of Indians in fact)
2. Learnt a few technical things!
3. Learnt and forgot basic German language.
4. Visited a few places including Paris.
5. Practiced cooking.
6. Went to religious Bhajan/Kirtan programs a few times.
7. Roughly experienced German lifestyle.
8. Watched LOTS of movies and TV series.
Now for the next coming months, I guess the same things are going to be repeated.
Hope
A beautiful ghazal from the album Hope by Jagjit and Chitra Singh :
क्या खबर थी इस तरह से वो जुदा हो जाएगा
ख्वाब में भी उसका मिलना ख्वाब सा हो जाएगा
ज़िन्दगी थी क़ैद हम में क्या निकालोगे उसे
मौत जब आ जायेगी तो खुद रिहा हो जाएगा
दोस्त बनकर उसको चाहा ये कभी सोचा न था
दोस्ती ही दोस्ती में वो खुदा हो जाएगा
उसका जलवा होगा क्या जिसका के पर्दा नूर है
जो भी उसको देख लेगा वो फ़िदा हो जाएगा
Research, Publications.. etc
Recently Jairam Ramesh was dragged in to controversy when he publicly announced that IIT and IIM professors are not world class. Well, I do agree with that statement, and being an NITian, I can say for sure that it holds true for my institution as well. Anyways, its a different matter altogether and I am not interested in analyzing the resumes of the NIT/IIT faculty.
But, driven by the current debate over this, I just pondered over the website of NIT Hamirpur to check out the present faculty members and any updates on what is going on these days. Following the resumes and clicking on publication links and roaming over the net here and there, I came to few places where the current standard of the so called academic research and publications from India reflects well and describes a lot!
Generally, when we see one’s resume and scroll down the list of publications in so and so journals, it gives a first impression of ‘wow.. pure scientist.. what a geeky fellow!’. But, we don’t usually go in depth to see whats being there inside the so called research work.
The resumes wont be lacking in number of publications for sure. Definitely they would be having a good number of so-and-so journal publications listed out. But none of them would be referring to IEEE or ACM journals. Why is that ? And most of these journals would be named as ‘International Journal of so-and-so’. If it is an international journal, why don’t I see them in my library? Or even, why don’t I get them in the first page when I google them? And why don’t I find a single article from a person not from India ?
The answers are pretty obvious. They have build up another parallel community of pseudo-researchers and publications, who believe in elongating their resumes, may be to get promoted or fool the interviewers some time in future, or just for the sake of decorating their CVs. A community, that is remotely associated with any kind of research activities (if any), and competing in plagiarism. A community believing in fakes and proudly owning other’s genuine efforts.
Have a look at the websites of such journals. They all start with the same phrase of ’International Journal of Computer Science and …’. And they are filled with articles from Indian self-claimed researchers and scholars. Most of them, I can say just by the title, that are not research papers but simple ‘studies’. For example efficiency comparison of algorithms. Or current trends in some technologies. Alright, we can have ‘study articles’ and there is nothing wrong in that. Well, the devil lies in the detail.
I opened up a few published articles, and they were not lacking in spelling or grammatical errors. Alright, pardonable. But what about the graphs and data diagrams directly copied from the books ? Even more, what about the contents directly copied from another’s paper without even bothering to mention him in the references?
One such journal website is here. I downloaded a bulky PDF of an article about ‘Feature Selection’ (No.5 in the list). Randomly selected a few lines from the article and did a google. And I was not surprised to get the original creation of the work. It was very nicely copied and pasted from the article without even bothering to change the sentence structure or replacing a few words by their synonyms. Obviously the ‘researchers’ didn’t have enough time to waste over such silly things! And of course, being a hardcore researcher they need to study so many papers and no wonder they forgot to mention this particular paper to acknowledge in the Reference sections!! Well, it would not be the only publication that has been pirated by the Indians. They would have definitely copied different sections from different other sources.
In this context, I am not substantiating Jairam Ramesh’s claims about IITs or IIMs. IIT professors definitely have more self esteem to do such a crime. But as a whole, the teaching community, the community of scholars and researchers in India, is definitely not trustworthy when their intellect is measured on the basis of number of Publications. Specially when all the publications are in an ‘International’ journal from India.
Religions, conversions etc.
Religion and related matters have started to occur in (almost) day to day conversations with the people around me. May be because, we have got nothing else to discuss about, or may be its just a little more thick than other subjects Whatever it might be, there’s one thing that has been debated a lot : conversions to other religion from hinduism.
My friend, hates it from the core of his heart. Gives certain arguments against it. I am not sure whether I agree.
To me, it doesnt matter what a person’s religion is. And I really dont care if all of the world get converted to Islam or Christian and we dont see any trace of Hinduism (well, its highly unlikely).
Why should I bother in fact. Christian missionaries (many, if not all) in India, target the poor, generally the SCs and STs (I am not assuming, anyone who has seen Mission compound in Koraput or Christian-peta in Jeypore would know that.). They give them quality education. Medical facilities, monetary benefits and likes. Then the persuade them to convert to Christianity. And they do. So, whats wrong in it?
The poor gets the money, they get good education, health etc. And all these facilities come at the cost of changing your religion and calling yourself a Christian. I certainly think they are doing a divine act. What could be more divine than serving the poor? Calling yourself Hindu and chanting Hare Rama Hare Krishna doesnt do any good to them. Does it? Try chanting Hare Rama Hare Krishna with an empty stomach.
If you want to ‘save’ your people from resorting to other religion, why dont you prove your religion to these people that whatever they expect in life, your religion is capable of providing that. Complaining over things makes no sense
He in fact detests Mother Teresa. Why? Cause she used to provide milk and all to the people and other facilities and people used to embrace Christianity!
I certainly respect her. Not because of her religious views or propaganda, but because of the work she has done for the Kolkata slum dwellers. So what was wrong in it? I dont think anything was wrong at all. People were leading their lives with misery. She helped them a bit. So why does it bother to you ? (Read ‘City of Joy’ and you’ll be devastated).
The whole discussion was pointless anyway. My belief is :
1. Someone wants to convert to other religion by his own will : let him.
2. Someone is converting others by providing him lucrative offers and benefits : let him. (If you dont like it, then provide these people more lucrative offers and benefits so that they will stick to your religion. Instead of crying foul, do something.)
3. Someone is converting others to his religion by doing unlawful things, (like raping or physically/mentally forcing, offering fake stuff and presuming not fake e.g. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v_RiQdFgX0 ) : its wrong
4. Someone is converting others to his religion by spreading superstitious beliefs using the fact that the people are illiterate : You please keep quite and try to educate your folks.
5. Vishnu and Jesus both suck (personal view).
Terrible 2010
Just realized I was having a terrible time exactly a year ago. I was in Vizag, somewhere near the beach.
Nothing more needs to be said.
Situation right now is a million times better!
The Revolutionaries
This is a work of fiction. Aise hi…
“All we need is a revolution. A deadly revolution. Of course its not the first time I am telling you this. But this topic demands discussions.
Like I was saying, all we need is a revolution. Thats what can save us. Save the society and make it livable. I mean, I am simply frustrated at the things happening around. Look at ourselves. We are supposed to be engineers. Supposed to be technocrats. But think once, are we really doing what we were supposed to do. Look at the people around. Bloody, everyone runs for a good grade. Fuck the studies. Fuck the concepts. Good Grades! What the hell! Do we really need good grades? Or we are supposed to be good scientists and engineers? Tell me man, who do you think in our batch is having all his concepts clear ? Bloody suckers. They all run after grades. I dont believe in this bullshit. And I am happy for that. I would rather live with low grades but I wouldn’t read those books just to remember line by line of it with exact punctuation marks.”
“Yea man. So true.”
“I too agree, yaar.”
“Abe chutiye, idhar laa.. mera turn hai.
Sunil makes nice rings. I try every time. But couldn’t do even once.
Like I was saying, we need a revolution. And this applies to all fields. I mean, in every part of the academics. See for example, bloody in India, people actually go for Bsc when they do not get into Engg or Medical colleges. This is very disappointing. Come on, do you think pure science is less dignified than Engg or medical studies. But somehow the society thinks like that. And I can tell you analogues things in other streams like humanities and commerce. This is all so messed up. Actually, the point is, the british left India with a crazy education system, and these old lads at the top are still dragging the same till now.”
“Yea man. I agree.”
“And I dont agree with the idea of this civil services at all. Have you seen the bloody paper? Crazy man. I bet the guys who set the paper cant answer those questions. Imagine man, just imagine, someone wants to be an administrator. Bloody, why the hell he would need to know what happened in a region near Kerala in some, lets say, 329 BC, and at the same time he should know the current bilateral treaties of India with namibia!! This whole thing is so fucked up.
The other day, I was attending a lousy talk of some officer who was an IAS of some 80s batch. The talk got over and he was responding to the questions of the Audience. I dont even remember what was the talk all about. Woman empowerment, child empowerment, SC ST empowerment .. god knows what. But these people seemed to listen all. And they were asking such crazy questions man. It was all so fishy.
And I raised my hand then. I asked him “What did Aurangzeb do on his 21st b’day?” . Everybody was looking at me with a look of surprise and disgust. That guy replied ”I dont know, and I think it has got nothing to do with the subject of discussion” . I didnt even know what was the subject of discussion. I said “probably you could have answered this if somebody had asked you when you cleared your IAS exam. But once you cleared it, you forgot all. So whats the point in asking such questions in UPSC? Just to clear the exam and forget it afterwards? Whats the achievement you got ? Memorizing a bunch crazy facts and figures which has got nothing to do with your work !!” Now he didnt say anything. Just passed a sarcastic look of ‘Shut up you asshole’. And I did shut up. But I know i am no asshole.”
“You didnt say it before man. You got the balls!”
“Yeah. He got the balls. Not attending classes and talking of revolution with a smoking weed in hand all day!”
“Shut up man. I am not into your crazy system of memorizing stuff and vomiting in the exam. You will see what I’ll do one day. Fuck off now.
They say me I just smoke and waste time out here. Bloody, they have forgotten their ancient roots. Like I was saying, the british screwed up the education system of India. And the same way, the Mughals screwed up the original culture of India. This is, you say, marijuana. But you forget at the same time that the one who you worship, Lord Siva, smokes it all the time. And when I do the same, I am spoiled! People dont even know the actual hindu culture and all. But still they claim themselves as Hindus. Its all fucked up man. You go out and talk about sex with somebody in a public place. They will look at you like you have committed a heinous crime. But they forget that hindu culture was all about sex. Bloody, if people in ancient days thought like the way they do now, they wouldnt have built those khajuraho and all. And the book of Kamasutra would have been destroyed like many unread copies of Mastraam.”
“Its all so fucked up man.”
“Yea man. I agree.”
“Its my turn now.”
“Hmm.. ye le..”
………
One weekend in Paris
Returned this morning after spending one weekend in Paris. I wouldn’t say it was superb, but it was good.
We stayed at a hostel called ‘Friend’s Hostel’ somewhere near the Barbes-Rochechouart metro station. Though it wasnt that good, it was the best affordable.
Paris is not as clean as the German cities. Many places people dont bother about traffic rules. Garbages cluttered along the roadside and on footpath gives a picture similar to India.
The Paris metro network is awesome. But the stations are not clean or well maintained. Delhi Metro is far more better than this one. But I said ‘awesome’ because of its connectivity. It almost connects you with each and every corner of the city. Again, the train standards are poor. Some trains run with tyres.
Eiffel Tower is beautiful indeed. Looks awesome at night. Couldn’t go to the very top because of some maintenance. Went till the 2nd stage, and it was nice.
Paris has a number of museums. Louvre is the largest. Its HUGE. It has got the Monalisa and some of Micheangelo’s creations. It was a must visit for us anyway. The glass pyramid of it also looks very nice.
In two days of time, it wasnt possible to visit all possible places. Hope to see some more in future if I visit again.
Getting a loan from SBI – 7
It was getting more and more difficult for me to just wait and watch. I thought of going to SBI once again and check out whats the progress been done.
31st May: I went to SBI and found that usual guy. I asked him what was the status of the application that I had submitted on 27th. He said he cant say it now as the application has been sent to the RBO Jeypore for further processing.
I asked whether he can find out anything from RBO? He says he can’t, as they have sent it only a day before, the RBO guys might get irritated!
So basically, I was refrained from knowing the status of my application just because someone things some other one will get upset!
I didnt have many choices. I was running out of money with every passing day and getting calls from the office every few hours. I had to make this thing clear somehow before this clerk goes on vacation again on 10th June. So I decided to leap into the RBO office in Jeypore and see whats happening there myself.
June 1st: I got a contact of someone who apparently goes to the RBO every other day and has good contacts over there. I asked him to find out whats the status of the application if he could. The next day he says, its been done and they’ll send it today to Koraput and I can go to SBI koraput and ask about that here.
What else could have made me happy at that moment! It was awesome. So the RBO people did it in a single day! It was overwhelming.
But then, something is wrong here. Things cannot go so smooth when you are dealing with SBI. So it was time to verify whether it has really went that smooth?
June 3rd: I went to SBI Koraput again. Asked this guy whether my app has been processed. He says they havent got any reply from RBO yet.
I said can you find out when they’ll send?
He said, he was busy, and it would be better if I would go to Jeypore and see whats happening there. Over and out.
So, the work was not over yet. Like I said, things cannot go so smooth when you are dealing with SBI.
June 4th:
In the scorching heat of summer, I went on en expedition to jeypore.
Though its only 22 kms away from Koraput, it takes at least 1 hour to reach there. And after I got there, I had to go to the remotest part of the town to locate the small RBO office.
It was 10 AM when I stepped into the office. And it was a pleasant one. ACs were working. And there was nobody else except a peon, 2 staffs and me. So the office was open only officially!
I waited half an hour when a few more staff came around. I went to someone who seemed to deal with loan stuff and said my story. He really looked concerned. So I was happy, that people seem to understand my situation.
He started searching through his files and computer and everything. But he couldnt locate my file. After few minutes of search he says to me that they havent got any file at all!
I was speechless. By this time I was determined to go back to bangalore and continue my life of a Software Engineer.
Then he says, probably, its with Mr Jena who hasnt come yet. He’ll come in the afternoon.
Now I had no other option but wait somehow till the afternoon when the chief manager comes. I went outside and realized it was only 11 AM. It was pathetic. And with every passing day, it was getting worse. I was investing so much of myself and I couldnt see anything happening!
I roamed around here and there like an ass. Went to my teacher who used to teach me mathematics when I was in 12th. had a chat with him and was back on the roads like an ass.
At around 2 PM, I went to the RBO again. And this time the chief manager was indeed there. I told him my story. And by this time I had been used to it: telling the same thing again and again to various people.
Now they started talking about how indian students survive outsides and how they study, what kind of jobs they do for part time earning etc. I was sitting and listening and was praying for my file to get processed.
The manager then asked for someone, and he brought up my file! So in the morning I had asked somebody else who doesnt deal with Loan stuff, but never said that. In fact he told me the Koraput SBI hasnt sent them the file!
So much wondrous things happen in SBI!!
Now the manager talked to me in detail about the application. He was very friendly and seemed helpful. Probably he was a learned one unlike other clerks. He said me that the loan will get sanctioned. But I had to do a few things from my side. What?
1. Go to koraput SBI, ask the Field officer to come and see my house and give an eye-estimation report saying what worth the house would be.
2. Fetch a lawyer and get a clearance certificate (lawyer’s opinion) that loan can be taken against this property.
Basically, these two things are something that was to be done by the SBI people themselves and they take the salary for doing these. But since I wanted my application to be processed ASAP, I had to get these tasks myself!
The only silver lining was that the Manager gave me his personal contact number and said I can call him up if something goes wrong and he would help.
So I was back to Koraput with two new jobs in hand.
Review: Freedom at Midnight
This is a copy paste from my earlier blog in multiply which I have stopped using since ages.
The Nizam of Hyderabad was a miser by nature, and was fond of pornography. He used to keep hidden cameras in the bathrooms meant for his guests! And he was said to be the richest man in the world.
Maharajas (of course not all) of India before independence, used to bet with each other about how many virgins they would deflower in a year!
Calcutta, the city of dreadful nights, was the most violent city of Asia at a time in history.
Jinnah, was suffering through a disease that had no cure, that’s why he was desperate to form a country of Muslims.
Gandhi’s father died when he (M.K) was making love to his wife.
As per the Hindu astrologers, 15th august 1947 was a day cursed by the stars, the independence day of India was not decided by any authority or congress or by consulting any people’s representative of India, it was a date that just slipped out of the tongue of Mountbatten!
Lady Mountbatten was surprised by the facilities and respect given to the viceroy and vicerine of India. On her first day in India, she devoured the chicken breasts that was meant for her pets!
Madanlal Pahwa was the first to attack Gandhi, but the plan had failed.
The pistol, that Godse used to shoot Gandhi, had been brought from Gwalior.
These are only a few out of thousands of facts that you’ll get from this book. Really very interesting and shocking as well. The book is divided into a number of chapters, and give a picture of India before and at the time of independence. The dreadful riots at the time of partitioning, and the conspiracy of Gandhi’s murder are also beautifully picturised. The love story of Boota Singh also finds a place in this book.
Interested in Indian history? this book can be a good companion.
Bangalore
I spent exactly 3 years ( 1st Sep 2007 to 31 Aug 2010 ) in the so called IT capital of India : Bangalore. And this is a brief account of what I feel about it.
1. Its really over hyped as a city of techies, sillicon valley, science capital and I dont remember what else. Whatever it may be, its a city that grew unexpectedly and out of proportions which lacks heavily in good infrastructure. During monsoon days, the situation becomes terrible.
Some say, that around 10-12 years ago, the inner ring road (then known as ring road) was encircling the city. Then the city expanded. During 2005, they came up with another ring road called ‘Outer Ring Road’ which encircled the city. Now the city expanded even more. Then the got a so called Peripheral Ring Road. And since the city is expanding even more, they are coming up with something called ‘Satellite ring road’. What will be the next ? May be milkyway ring road which will touch Chennai to the east and Mangalore to the west!
2. Its a city of fakeness. The same could be said about Noida or Gurgaon may be, but I am not concerned about those now. Its a place where people deliberately show off. Particularly youngsters studying in Engg colleges or new recruits of software companies. Spikes on head or the elastic of underwear is not a rare site. They love to ‘hang out’ at malls and ‘chill out’ at over priced restaurants and bars.
I remember once in Landmark, a book store at the famous Forum mall, some youngsters came in. All dressed in skinny jeans and party-wear shirts with gel covered heads. Before I could make out anything about them in my mind, one of them spit out a sentence to another of their group which destroyed the whatever impression they had created among people while entering the store. That guy said in raw bhojpuri: ‘E, ee ka dekh raha hai. Kono intresting buk hai ka ?’ Now I have to say that bhojpuri is not a smooth language. At least I dont think so. It always sounds like the person is about to start a fight!
Why cant they be what they are.
And, I dont know why, the MG Road and Brigade Road in Bangalore is just too famous without any reason. The brigade road would be of 200 metres length. And people say it looks like Las Vegas. So, you have 200 meters of road which you say looks like Las Vegas! What a joke. To add more, on the weekends, you’ll find may be some millions of youngsters on the Brigade Road pavements. Just hanging out! They wont be doing anything, but walking up and down the street and drooling over the opposite sexes. Guys would be dressed in the latest fashion of Shahid Kapoor or Saif, and girls in tights or minis to show what they have got. But in the end they would be doing nothing. Just walk up and down the streets and after they return to their 1 or 2 bhk rented apartments in BTM or Jayanagar, talk about what exciting did they see : A cleavage, someone’s butt crack, a girl smoking or a Lamborghini !
3. Yes, it is indeed a city of techies. But when you say techies, it actually doesn’t mean someone really a computer wizard or a technically strong. Its only yet another asshole whose designation is software engineer. I never supported the designation ‘Software Engineer’ as such. Because hardly we used to ‘engineer’ the software. Its like you call a auto mechanic a ‘mechanical engineer’. Better the people should be identified as ‘software fitter’ or ‘technician’.
In Bangalore, you pick randomly 10 people from the streets and I bet 6 or 7 will be software professionals. It will be 10 out of 10 if you are in places like Marathalli, Koramangala, BTM etc. And 90% of them will be waiting for the weekends to come on weekdays and will be scolding their managers or their respective companies. As Friday comes, plans will be laid for movies at PVR or a daaru party. In Bangalore, techies form the biggest market for Marijuana. First techies, then the biggest share is taken by the local engineering students.
4. Probably in Bangalore, we get more consultancies helping you get a job in a software firm than the number of software firms itself. And you can assume the worst possible jobs to get through those consultancies and yet designated as ‘software engineer’. They call you to places like Banashankari for an interview at a software firm which you would have never heard of and even in Google you cant locate it. Now there is something special about Banashankari. Its a place which is divided into phases, stages, and layouts. And you can never guess which is the subset of what and which is the superset of all. God knows how the postman delivers the posts.
After you get there with a hopeful mind to get a job, they’ll go through your entire career as if they are going to place you in some high end research group which is to work in close collaboration with CERN! They will probably even say that they have got so many applications, and its difficult for them to sort out the right candidates without conducting a GD. And at this time you’ll be dead sure that you’ll be working with CERN!
Only when you ask them about the work and other formalities twice or thrice, they’ll care to reveal that you need to pay 70000 initially, and then there will be 3 months of training and then you’ll get a software tester’s or a BPO job which will pay you 8000 rupees a month.
5. Bangalore is probably having the worst traffic in India. Its definitely worse than Delhi, Gurgaon, Chandigarh, Bhubaneswar, Visakhapatnam, Hyderabad or Chennai. Bangalore’s roads are not capable enough to handle the huge number of vehicles. Apparently the govt had called some delegates from US to analyse and discuss a solution but they were scared to see on CCTVs how the traffic is running and said nothing can be done!
6. Lots of people like Bangalore’s weather. For its not as hot as Delhi neither too cold in winters. But the lack of winter is also disappointing. At least you should have 1 month of winter to enjoy the cold. In Bangalore, its none at all.
All I have mentioned above are negatives. Well, it has its good points as well. Like its easy to get a job if you have contacts. And in summers, the heat is tolerable unlike in Chennai or Delhi. And even though its in South India, you’ll get lots and lots of people speaking Hindi or English. There’s not much language problem for the outsiders as there is in Chennai. I have even met bus conductors and auto drivers who spoke good english.
Whatever it is. I spent 3 years there. With friends. And I wont mind staying there again; among the chaos and show-offs and arrogant dishonest auto drivers and heavy traffic and over priced restaurants and Blossoms and…
Learning Deutsch
Learning Deutsch is a tough task. Particularly when you simply attend classes and enjoy back at home. Apparently its 6th most difficult language in Europe. Estonian, Finnish etc are tougher than Deutsch.
For me, my classes are over. And I expect to be certified with the level of A1. So, can I speak in German? Of course not. All I can do now is write simple sentences as ‘I am a boy’ and ‘She is a girl’!
Deutsch has four cases for its nouns! Akkusativ, Dativ, Genitiv and Nominativ. When you learn a single one, that would appear simple. When combined with the other cases to construct a sentence, it results in a mess.
In Deutsch, nouns have genders : Maskulin, Feminin, Neutral. And this makes the whole scenario disastrously complex. Because the above four cases behave differently for different gendered nouns resulting in a number of permutations. Now these permutations are not mutually exclusive. In fact, the nominativ of masculine nouns clashes with the dativ of feminine nouns. And a few more clashes are there to make it complicated.
Anyways, now it is over. I now plan to learn Deutsch by watching Deutsch movies. May be I’ll start with Aishwarya Rai’s “Bride and Prejudice’ dubbed into German. It will be fun to see sardars in Amritsar speaking German!
Getting a loan from SBI – 6
Date 26th May, Afternoon :
I desperately searched for the document that my teacher had given me 7 years back. And I could find it!. Thanks to me that I take care of my documents pretty well.
So I thought I had all the documents and everything is in place. What else could delay the application ?
I went to the bank, as usual, at 3 PM. Handed over whatever I had to the clerk.
Now, again a series of questions came out of him.
Clerk : How much loan you are applying for ?
(How many times he would ask the same thing! Cant he read the form what I have filled ?)
I : 9 Lakhs
Clerk : What are you showing as collateral security ?
I : My house
Clerk: In whose name the house is ?
I : My mother.
Clerk: But you have only shown your Father as your Guarantor. You would have to add your mother as well.
(You could have said the same thing in any of my previous visits as well.)
Before I could say anything, he handed me another guarantor form and asked me to fill that up and get it back. Dismiss.
I was now almost sure that its not going to happen at all. When the submission of the application was taking this much time, it was foolish to be optimistic for the loan to be sanctioned!
Yet I was determined to submit my application and leave it.
I went home and filled out the form. I needed one passport sized photo of my Mother. Probably she had not faced any requirement of getting a PP size photo for decades. We were now out for a studio.
In Koraput, there are 4/5 photo studios in total. And to add to my delay, it was a wednesday and everything was closed. We realized it was a wednesday after moving all around the town.
Now, I could do it only on the next day.
Date 27th May, Morning
I went to the bank in the morning. I wasn’t sure if I can submit my application even now. I would not have been surprised if he had asked me to get some more documents ( such as Matriculation Certificate of my neighbor! ).
Fortunately, he was satisfied with the documents. Thank God for that.
But it was not to happen silently of course. He started again with his questions. And this time it was a ‘qualitative’ final interview, like we generally have those HR interviews while getting into a job. He asked me what do I want to study. Why do I want to study that. Why chose Germany for it and many more.
I was answering him with technical terms about Embedded Systems, Computer Architecture etc.! I didn’t know his background. Definitely he was not an Engineer. And I was sure he didn’t understand a single thing what I said. But who cares. Finally he accepted the application. And that was all for me.
I was relieved.
I asked when I could expect any result. He replied, within 10 days. And he was again going on leave from 10th of June. So it had to be within 10th of June anyhow. And, as he gave a time line of 10 days, that was well before 10th of June. So, I was happy!
I wasn’t bothered about returning to Bangalore although I was losing a considerable amount of money each day and was getting calls and messages from my team in office. I had to close this Loan chapter.
Now, as I had submitted the application, what was my role in Koraput left ? Rest was to be done by the SBI, right ?
Well, no. I had submitted. But I had to get it processed!
Getting a loan from SBI – 5
Why was I in deep shit?
I analysed my situation in the whole context which I had not done till that day. Till then, I wasn’t actually giving much interest to the loan thing. Cause I was occupied with other things which were of much importance than my loan or higher studies. (My brother had just attained another milestone in his track of accidents! ).
Now, it was 24th of May. I had to be in Germany by September 1st. So by August 15th I had to get the VISA as well as by then I should be relieved from my job. That means by June 15th I had to file my resignation. And by the same time I had to apply for VISA. And VISA people want to see money. So by June 15th, I had to get the stupid loan cleared! And it was the last week of May and I had not applied for it yet. Things were indeed not very smooth. Looking at the efficiency of the Bank, I could swore that I wouldn’t get the loan even by 15th of June next year!
But what could I do ? Hope.
The next day onwards, it became a routine for me to make my attendance at SBI. Wake up in the morning, freshen up, have breakfast, run to the bank. Come for lunch. Take a short nap. And again run to the bank at 2.30 / 3 PM in the terrible heat of summer ( it was normally 43 C those days ).
And in bank, as usual, my time was filled with lots of commas and semicolons : wait and watch. Thats all! You cant risk having an argument as that would jeopardize whatever hope you have. You have to be in the herd. Listen to the clerk saying bullshit things seriously and with an expression of an intellectual. The clerk might simply start a conversation out of the blue about America’s Foreign Policy and you have have to show your deep interest in the subject as well as appreciation for the ‘deep’ ( which apparently he thinks having ) knowledge over the subject. Initial days, I found it difficult to suppress my irritation. But sooner, I adapted.
The course of events in the following two days were like :
25th May morning :
I went to the bank in the morning with the duly filled in application and all relevant documents. I expected my submission would be done this time for sure.
No. The clerk pointed out a number of ‘errors’ in the form and asked me to fill another form. Also to sign all the documents I was submitting. It took me around half an hour to complete all these. By that time, the clerk went busy with other people and I had to leave to return back after lunch.
25th May afternoon :
Again, I went to the bank with the newly filled application and all the documents. Gave the clerk all I had. he went through those. He could read the form and see how much I am asking for, but still he asked explicitly how much I was applying for. I said 9 lakhs. He asked how am I going to give the rest of the amount. I said, I have.
He got interested in how come I have the rest of the amount. I said I had been doing job since last 3 years in Bangalore and so I could save some. He asked how much I was getting in Bangalore per month. I was boiling inside. (Why the hell does that bother to you ? Do you plan to become a software engineer too ?) I said somewhere 30k per month. He asked me, then why do you want to leave the job ?
This was unbearable. I was getting irritated like hell and I couldn’t do anything. What was the point giving an interview to this guy ? Why can’t he mind his own business and process my loan ? I managed somehow with this interview.
But my application was not submitted. Why ? Apparently I missed a few photographs and some more documents. I said I have given whatever you had asked for. He simply said, the list is not updated, and I forgot to tell you. He didn’t mention sorry. Why should he !!!
I returned. Frustrated.
26th May morning :
I was in a firm state of mind that I will submit my application that day anyhow.
The clerk went through the application. Went through all the attached documents. Then opened his bank of questions :
Clerk: When did you finish your 10th ?
Me: 2000
Clerk: When did you finish your 12th ?
Me: 2002
Clerk: When did you finish your B-tech ?
Me: 2007
Clerk: What was the duration of your B-tech ?
My heart skipped a beat.
Me: 4 years
Clerk: So what you did 1 year in between
Me: I was preparing for the entrance exams.
Clerk: There is the problem. We cannot give an education loan to someone having a break in his studies. We need the account of all the years.
I couldn’t understand how invented this within a moment just by himself. As such a clause was nowhere to be seen in SBI’s website!
I asked, how it is to be done then ? He says if you had gone to any coaching institute those days, you can get in writing from them that you were studying there for that period!
I wasn’t going to any coaching institute that time. But luckily, really luckily, my tutor (under whom I was taking tuition during 11th and 12th had given me a similar document in 2003 before taking admission in NIT).
I said I will get it in the afternoon.
I thought of my brother saying once just like that: before you throw any document, keep it for 7 years. If in 7 years it doesnt come to any use, throw it!
Indeed, that document came to use after 7 years!
And yes, I had not submitted my application yet!
Getting a loan from SBI – 4
24th May:
I went again to SBI at 2.45 PM and found nobody. I took the only seat available next to the loan-clerk and waited for the clerk to come. Sometime after 3 he did come. Luckily this time I was the only applicant there. I was very optimistic because of my luck. After the clerk took his seat, he asked me, once again, the purpose of my visit. As before, I said about the loan. he took my university admission letter and had a brief look. Then, he left his desk!
I kept waiting. And he didnt go outside the bank to have a tea or gossip with others. He was literally running around the bank from here to there. It seemed like he was the one responsible for many things at the bank. He was there at the money withdrawal counter at one moment. The other moment he was resetting passwords for people who came in relation to net banking. Was he doing all the tasks accumulated for him while he was on leave? I could never knew that. The moment he was passing through ‘his’ counter, I would become hopeful that he’ll take his seat now. But I had to wait. And this is indeed the mantra for all indian govt or semi-govt organisations: wait, have patience!
After 4, he came to his desk. Started chatting with me about where I did my 12th, where I did my graduation and where I want to go. No whys. And then, pulled the same A4 sheet having the checklist of documents, that the older clerk had already given to me. Before he could pulled it through, I said I already have that. Then he searched for a form, and gave it to me. That was the actual loan form I had to fill.
He just handed me that form and asked me to fill it and come with all the earlier mentioned documents the next day.
So I did make some progress. After 4 visits to SBI. But I wondered why this thing couldnt have been done on the very first day? Just handing me over the two things : a checklist of documents and the application form. That surely could have been done on my first visit, if only the clerk had wanted. But they dont let it happen so easily. I dont know the reason behind this. May be they want to prove that they are the ones holding our strings. Or they are ignorant of the fact that actually we are the customers and we can screw them if we wanted. Or may be they are used to the prestige and respect offered by the mostly illiterate people of Koraput and hence behave like grade A officers. Who knows!
I was happy as of the day. Finally I had got the form and all I had to do was fill it and submit the other mentioned docs from the checklist and submit. I did my homework and slept.
Then I realised I was in deep shit.
Getting a loan from SBI – 3
It was only the beginning and many things were yet to come. I had not even submitted my application. I expected to do it asap and leave for Bangalore. Not because I was longing to solve customer reported bugs, but because I had already wasted all my available leaves in january, March and April. Now I was in Koraput in ‘loss of pay’. And everyday I was losing more than 1000 rupees.
Not to mention about my manager trying to reach me and find out where on earth I was.
The God had said, to come on 25th to the temple and offer my plea. I gave a glimpse to the calender to find that it was a Tuesday. I assumed that the actual person responsible for the loan might actually bother to end his holidays on a Sunday and start coming to the office on Monday. So I went up there in the early hours (10 ‘O clock in the morning) on 24th.
But, some people were more desperate than I was. They had already lined up there before I reached. I wondered if my term would really come that day. Somewhere at 10.30 the clerk came. A fresh recruit. He would be somewhere of my age. I thanked god that I wouldn’t be dealing with a lazy fatigued and procrastinating old lad.
But it was all the same.
People never form a queue at the Loan section. They always stand surrounding the table of the clerk with their pelvis leaning on the table edge. If more applicants come, they form a outer circle. And this goes on. While one’s application is being processed, everyone else will listen and watch carefully to both the conversing people : the clerk and the applicant. They’ll keep on scrutinizing the whole episode. At the same time, if for a while the clerk seems idle ( which he manages not to look so ), all other applicants will move their papers some inches forward to the clerk. And the clerk will give them a detesting look.
I joined the herd. Because thats the way things work there. Be in the circle and try your luck. The clerk looked at me for an instant and he knew that one more applicant has come. I stood there for more than an hour, consistently looking for opportunities to converse with the clerk. At last, he asked me, my purpose of visit, the same way the older lad had asked. I said I am for an educational loan. He said he was busy and asked me to come after 3 P.M.
Again, it was over. No progress.
About India
I am happy that nobody pointed out anything negative against India. Yes, I do say many things against my own land but I would not like to hear that from somebody else .
So, what actually they pointed out about India :
1. Lots of people
2. Crowded and chaotic cities
3. Taj Mahal
4. Hard working (referring to most western jobs being outsourced to India)
5. Ganges
6. Hinduism
7. Elephants and Monkeys
8. Spicy food
9. Colorful
10. Mathematics
11. Classical dances
12. Diverse languages
Thats all I can remember as of now. I have covered most of them though.
It was really nice to see what people think about India. Yes, India does have a name in mathematics!
*Edit:
Forgot to mention 13. Arranged Marriages (which they noticed in the indian soap operas relayed in Brazil!)
Getting a loan from SBI – 2
It was our first trip to the bank and was without any result. As he had said, come in the afternoon, I prepared to go back there at 2:30 PM.
It was terribly hot there (44 degrees). I went out alone. I reached at the bank at aroud 2:30 PM.
Ceiling fans whirling. Computers on with screen savers on their monitors. But not a single soul to be found. I asked the security person. He says the staff has gone for lunch and will be back soon.
How soon will that be ?
He says after 3.
I had no option but to wait. I sat on the only available chair next to the loan-clerk’s table so as to get the first priority among all the loan seekers. I sat there for more than half an hour. Dozing. Watching here and there. Counting ceiling fans and reading screen saver texts. At 3.10 the mahatma came to the office. Laughing, chatting, making merry with his co-workers!
As soon as he takes his chair, he changes his face to the maximum serious looking shape. He asks me about the purpose of my visit.
Once again I said, education loan. He asks me about the offer letter. I handed him the same.
The offer letter was having simple 2 paragraphs. Out of which 1 was in German which of course he couldn’t read. I thought it would take him at the max, may be 10 minutes. Well, I was wrong. he was scanning through the texts as if searching for some hidden message from the university directed only to him. To read a single paragraph it took him 25 long minutes.
Then he raises from his seat. Takes my university letter to someone else. I dont know what he asked him. May be he didn’t understand that 1 paragraph in 25 minutes and needed help from a pro! He comes back. With the same serious expression in face, he searches for some document. Finally finds one. And he hands me that. Thats a checklist of documents to be brought.
He says, get all the documents mentioned in the checklist and come back.
I said, ok, I will come tomorrow.
He says no. he points me to the empty counter next to his, and says that guy is reponsible for the loans and he is on leave. he will be back on 25th. So you come after 25th!
I was terribly annoyed. I had wasted 1 hour in the morning and 1 more hour in the afternoon just to get this checklist and to hear that I will have to come back on 25th and till then nobody can do anything.
I returned home.
